hes under my skin

hm

2005-11-28T18:06:54Z

dont use this anymore.. www.xanga.com/unreachablebaby_x3

who has to know?

2005-11-13T05:03:27Z

well.

i am at this guy named Will's house........

today was so wierd.

Jeff broke up with me

and i have FEELINGS for Andrew STILL.

so yeah.

??????????????????/

ill be just fine pretending im not.

2005-10-24T02:33:58Z

im thinking about making my journal friends only.

people are leaving me fucking gay comments.//////////

but anyways.......

this is prolly gonna be my last entry that just anyone can view.

I AM SO FREAKIN UPSET.

i dont want to feel this way......so UNWANTED..

donno what to do.

ah.

i got tagged by Jenna like a week ago lol so here..

2005-10-23T22:01:05Z

10 Things That Make Me Happy! [In no particular order]

1. friends
2. Jeff
3. the used
4. music in general
5. scary movies
6. cuddling
7. food
8. fridays
9. hot tubs
10. being in grawn(ha)

Then tag six friends to do the same....
1.
2.
3.
4. everyone HA
5.
6.

alyssaashleyx3 @ 2005-10-23T01:48:00

2005-10-23T05:48:30Z

i hate the way you talk to me.and the way you cut your hair.i hate the way you drive my car.i hate it when you stare.i hate your big dumb combat boots.and the way you read my mind.i hate you so much it makes me sick;it even makes me rhyme.i hate the way youre always right.i hate it when you lie.i hate it when you make me laugh.even worse when you make me cry.i hate it when your not around.and the fact that you didnt call.but mostly i hate the way i dont hate you.not even close.not even a little bit.not even at all.

Why do i feel so bad.

2005-10-23T04:38:16Z

"Cut Up Angels"

If we cut out the bad
Well then we’d have nothing left
Like I cut up your mouth
The night I stuffed it all in
And you lied to the Angel
Said I stabbed you to death
If we go at the same time
They'll clean up the mess

I lost my head
You couldn’t come
This lust to my brain almost feels like a gun

Watched you bite into the bottle
Watched me kick out the chair
Let you chew up the glass
And laughed as you just hung there
I have thought of rose petals mostly perfect and pure
Then I thought of your petals
And the abuse they’ve been through

I lost my head
You couldn’t come
This lust to my brain almost feels like a gun
You lost your head
I couldn’t come
This lust to my brain almost feels like a gun
Whoa whoa

I told the angels
Cant stay in heaven
I asked the devil
If we cut out the bad well then we'd have nothing left
Like I cut up your angels
Yeah you stabbed me to death

I lost my head
You couldn’t come
This lust to my brain almost feels like a gun
You lost your head
I couldn’t come
This lust to my brain almost feels like a gun

"Bulimic"

From the way that you acted
to the way that I felt it
It wasn't worth my time
and now it's sad cause all I missed
wasn't that good to begin with
and now that I've started you begging
saying things that you don't mean
it isn't worth my time
a line's a dime a million times
and I'm about to see all of them

Goodbye to you, goodbye to you, you're taking up my time [x3]
Goodbye to you, goodbye to you

You call my name when I wake up
to see things go your way
I'm coughing up my time
each drag's a drop of blood a grain
a minute of my life
it's all I've got just to stay down
why the fuck am I still down
I'm hoarding all that's mine
each time I let just one slip by
I'm wasting what is mine

Goodbye to you, goodbye to you, you're taking up my time [x3]
Goodbye to you, goodbye to you

My time [x3]

I'm about to see a million things
I thought I'd never see before and I
I'm about to do all of the things
I've dreamed of and
I don't even miss you at all
[x2]

Goodbye to you, goodbye to you, you're taking up my time [x7]
Goodbye to you, goodbye to you

id do it all again..just want you to know.

2005-10-22T22:39:24Z

Well..Jeff asked me out yestday..but im so EXTREMELY scared that hes gonna hurt me. he didnt even cALL me today.... i called him and he was hanging out with Tara...yeah that makes me worried..but i guess we'll just have to wait and see what happens..
:(:((:(:(:(:(
i really like him ALOT..
its hard for me to show it after MATT..
:(:(:((:(:(:(:(::(
okay..bye.
Alyssa

p.s.
the only thing worse then not knowing. is you not knowing that i know.

i gotta get out of here..

im BEGGING you to be my ESCAPE!!!!

dose yourself in cheep perfume

2005-10-10T14:55:02Z

SERIOUSLY. this weekend was crazy.

okay..

FRIDAY- Alexa and Lindsay and i hung out at my house till the 3rd quarterish of the game (CENTRAL LOST THEIR HC GAME HAHA)lol sorry..anyways..i guess a girl brought a gun. hmm...tc is so ghetto.

SATURDAY- Andrew was like "hey im with my friend Jeff and were goin to hang out wanna come?" so they came and picked me up. And me and Jeff just really seemed to hit it off right away. And Andrew (this is not Gary..its the kid i just met) kept like bitching to Jeff like saying me and him were practically dating and i was HIS (wtf) and so I got really irratated. But im so glad i met Jeff!

SUNDAY- Jeff took me to see a movie..ah..its that deep blue whatever lol. it was a good movie! and we were there with some of his friends..and it was fun. then we went to this kid Will's house..Andrews brother..im just gonna call Andrew Gary: Gary..and the other Andrew: Dr. Croc. so i dont confuse myself. lol. anyways..Will made a fucking minivan/limo and its so fuckin sweet. lol then we went to Rays..again..and it was fun.. it was Ray.me.Jeff.Dr.Croc.Will.some skinny kid.Gary,and Tara. And a couple other kids came later. Ray even busted out the microphone and Will was like burping in it. lol but yeah..it was fun.

AND JEFF'S GOING TO HC WITH ME!!!):

*Seriously..ive never felt this way..except with Matt..and so im exciteeeeeeed!

Well. i best be off. im in bst. lol

i had a convo with Alexa about why she likes the V instead of the P. lol wow..that was weird..lol
i love her!

k peace nig.

Alyssa Ashley

like 5 days ago..

2005-10-10T14:53:52Z

Well. i finally confronted someone about something thats been bothering me..kinda. so its all good now. I think tonight im hanging out with Carl..but idk. i cant WAIT for homecoming! its gonna be AWESOME! heck yes..
too bad no GUY wants to go with me awwww..
its okay tho! last night i went with my Gma..my Aunt..Ashley..and Allyson Billy to RED LOBSTER for her bday! i got her the BREAKFAST CLUB MOVIE! then later we watched LAGUNA BEACH! the COMPLETE first season yeahhhh
anyways..i might go to the library tonight. its so nice out i wanna ride my bike! i think my Dads in MACNAC and i hope hes there for another day and night cuz hes annoying and mean . so anywho! JOHN*im sorry! i feel bad cuz u did all the work ill make it up 2 u!
Justin and Travis threw pens at me last hour..alright!
im getting hungry already. i dont want to go to LIT next hour..im having troubles writing my story..because we have to make everything up..but like..with heros..monsters..and gods and goddesses and schtuff!!!!!! yikes.
well..i guess im gonna go.
PEACE NIG!
x3Alyssa

p.s.

HOOOOT.

he's well hung and im hanging on

2005-10-07T15:39:31Z

Yeah. Well i def. cant wait for homecoming. its def. gonna rock! And me and Amanda are thinking about inviting AUBS AND JOSIE!! thatd be so awesome!

Last night pretty much sucked. I hung out with Tara and Andrew(my ex) who were hooking up. sweet i know. and Ray, and the othe Andrew(who i guess likes me idk). We went to the mall. they smoked so much in the car..it made me sick..especially after i gave in and had uno cig. SICK. but ya know..

oh, and before that was the SPECTACULAR counslers appt. Let me tell you.. NEVER AGAIN. I got so mad this time..that i actually walked out..
and then the counsler came and asked me to come back in for a minute..but that just was poinless.

I think i know whose been leaving me comments..its just said that their too pussy to admit it..i mean come on..seriously..its not like i can kick anyones ass..i just WANT to..

Well.. I think i have pink marker on my face..like a line..i tried to wash it off inbetween classes..but i def. gave up. Well..im off like a prom dress!!

MUCH <3..

Alyssa Ashley

if you want apologies, you just might hold your breath. until your breathing stops FOREVER.

2005-10-04T20:31:44Z

A FEW DAYS AGO-

Well. i finally confronted someone about something thats been bothering me..kinda. so its all good now. I think tonight im hanging out with Carl..but idk. i cant WAIT for homecoming! its gonna be AWESOME! heck yes..
too bad no GUY wants to go with me awwww..
its okay tho! last night i went with my Gma..my Aunt..Ashley..and Allyson Billy to RED LOBSTER for her bday! i got her the BREAKFAST CLUB MOVIE! then later we watched LAGUNA BEACH! the COMPLETE first season yeahhhh
anyways..i might go to the library tonight. its so nice out i wanna ride my bike! i think my Dads in MACNAC and i hope hes there for another day and night cuz hes annoying and mean . so anywho! JOHN*im sorry! i feel bad cuz u did all the work ill make it up 2 u!
Justin and Travis threw pens at me last hour..alright!
im getting hungry already. i dont want to go to LIT next hour..im having troubles writing my story..because we have to make everything up..but like..with heros..monsters..and gods and goddesses and schtuff!!!!!! yikes.
well..i guess im gonna go.
PEACE NIG!
x3Alyssa

p.s.

HOOOOT.

TODAY-

Well..in 6th hour..Carly and I were bitching eachother out..kinda..and so I left the class..took the pass..and came back like 15-20 minutes later..and the teacher; Miss Foster....kinda bitched at me.. so that was great. But when I was waiting for my Dad to pick me up after school..Carly came and found me and I think we might have worked some things out. :) I miss hanging out with her. :(

Carl hit Holly. YEAH..I guess Holly was walking inside the school and he hit her with his car..not like really bad..but shes on crutches. wow. lol..thats cool....
:/

i want a date to homecoming.
i DONT want a boyfriend tho.
i WANT to have fun.
i dont want to do my hw.
the soap from the library smells wierd..
he STILL looks at me..and it reminds me of those times..when hed just look at me and id fall in love with him all over again..but you know..thats in the past..i guess.
i dont know why i still miss him? maybe its just cuz i cant have him. lol

much love.
Alyssa

p.s.
if anyone has a problem..im here for you..theres a lotta shit going on right now..and i dont even mind being in the middle of it.

BiRtHdAy LiSt :)

2005-10-03T01:00:21Z

if you love me and wanna get me something for my bday:: nov.17th (i know its far away)

heres what I want::::::

.laguna beach first season
.the used cds
.less then jake cds
.the breakfast club
.sixteen candles
.HIM
.money
.a CARRRRRRRR! ha.

ha yeah.

breaking hearts never looked so cool ;)

2005-10-01T20:54:58Z

so everytime i open up to a guy.. he USUALLY ends up doing something that just shuts me back up. but i think ill just give up this time :) its over now.

i rode my bike to the library again. damn im good. more americans should ride their bikes..were all getting fat.

:(

but anyways..what to get Allyson Billy? prolly something Laguna Beachish. !

alright.

lovelove
Alyssa

p.s.
1:why does he stare at me? i was the one who was told to get over it!
2:mmmm this kid is just so hot....homecoming? donno..

you look so good in blue.

2005-09-30T22:21:03Z

so Amanda talked to Carl and he said whenever hes around me he thinks of me as Matt's G/F...yikes....hm

ALLYSON BILLYS BDAY ON SUNDAY HAPPY BDAY BIOTCH! I LOVE YOU!!!

prom=fun

be there..or be []

I LOVE YOU ALL..

PEACE NIG!

whoevers leaving me those cute little commments.. i donno who you are but maybe you should identify yourelf..its just really pathetic..im sure theres stupid shit you say.

:)

ill weigh you down ill watch you choke.

2005-09-29T22:07:25Z

me and my Mom got in a huge fight.
no more counciling

i was like crying and i talked to my Uncle's G/F Barbie.and she's like "its not wonder you havent tried to kill yourself between your Mom and your Dad."

... does that scare anyone? i wont..

im actually really happy considering all the crap thats going on.

well im off like a prom dress bitch.

peace nig.

Alyssa

alyssaashleyx3 @ 2005-09-29T11:04:00

2005-09-29T15:04:16Z

yeah i was jk bout GL homecoming ha...

i swear id burn the city down to show you the light.

2005-09-29T14:42:19Z

yeah so someones been leaving me cute messages. :)

awwww!!!!!!

homecomings gonna kick ass. Me and Emily Weber are going...yeah were gonna make it count!

yeah so i might also go to GL's homecoming!! yeahhhh!!! thatd be awesome!

****oh. and its NIG because its an (inside joke) so thanks for trying to correct me but it didnt work :) fucker.

im so happy! yesterday my Mom and i went to my Doctors appt. and i gained a WHOLE POUND! i found my digital camera! and we went to RED LOBSTER yummm! so exciting! i heart crab!

but yeah.........

i really like being single.....

and its REALLY funny..when your ex is looking at you everytime you guys walk past eachother. :/

JUSTINE- are we still moving in DEC? i want to so......BAD!
:)
its gonna be awesome!

well i donno what else to say for now.

bitch get in my car!

PEACE NIG!

^^^^^^^^^^ ALEXA. ha. i love you.

MUAHZ.

Alyssa

what are you hungry for?

2005-09-26T22:03:18Z

Im at the LIBRARY ...yay! i rode my bike all the way here@ score! councelers appt. blowed. of course it was them against me. and Fred was there. oh..i got a referal because i was gone for 37* minutes during a movie in Mrs. Kroupa's class...umm..i was gone for 10 minutes..and i have fucking witnesses. so..im pissed. i think im gonna go visit John at work..maybe even apply..donno tho.:) but yeah..

im so aggrevated and frusturated! i donno what to do anymore.. EAT..sounds goooood! k well i gotta peace!

later nig.

x3Alyssa. muah.

visiting hours are 9 to 5 and if i show up at 10 past 6 will i already know that ull find someway to sneak me in i know by the empty bottles with the holes along the bottom that its too much to ask for.

why should i care?

2005-09-23T14:53:24Z

so yeah..im at the school..and they definately blocked livejournal.com...so i have to write in this and then copy and past it later to my xanga and livejounal! fun so im really getting annoyed at *someone* who stares at me alot..stare at ur own fukking gf..ha. i think im going to the mall and then the game tonight..but i donno.
i got a new cell fone. 3925856. you should call me. yeah..you. okay well anyways..what else is new? not really a whole lot..just school. i went to a party last friday..with Amanda and Ashley..it was fun! but i didnt drink or nething! so its all good..
yeah there MIGHT be a party Friday..but idk..

Im almost off my meds!score! jk......but seriously
my Dads so pissed at me..bc he had to call an automated voice thing for his unemployment check..and i definately forgot and got on the other fone and dialed numbers.. im so scared that i fukked something up!

lunch isnt for like another 2 hours almost..its 1030..ugh. i might go to the homecoming at Glen Lake.. and John said hed pay for me to go to the homecoming here at West. lol score.

yeah..and i dont know about Carl..im starting to kinda like him..like more than a friend..but i dont really know how he feels.

and im supposed to hang out with Andrew and his friend Andrew after school today. oh and i have a counslers appt. too. LOVELY. ha. alright. well. i gotta rocket.
peace nig.

x3 Alyssa

hold me close. dont ever let me go :)

2005-09-14T20:18:02Z

alright. SOOOOO I went to a counslers appt. yesterday. and that .......waaas. GAY. let me tell u. But I got to hang out with Carl so its ok! We watched Dead Birds>>dumb ass movie lol. and it was storming so hardcore! i love it!
My cousin Allyson's playing Sim 2......holy crap its cool! Exciting..
so guess what i got called?! Boobless Wonder! yes.. lol
Schools been good..i like my classes..the teachers are cool...and i have a friend in all my classes except 1..::BST. but thats okay.
Today me and Alexa and Lindsay nigger rigged Allyson's locker! yeah it was sweet.
i guess were goin to a pizza party in a little bit at like 5ish....with Alexa and Kaira..so i best be going!
Ill try to write more later! i hate this song!

Alyssa

/Carl/

goodbye to you. goodbye to you. youre taking up my time :)

2005-09-12T21:14:27Z

alright. i dont give a fuck if he reads this..
Justin is one of the MANY guys who go around asking girls out till he finds one that says "yes" well im not one of them. FUCK THAT.
damn.
:) well. im at Allyson's.. cuz Alexa gets outa work at 645. and we might go piering. so im excited. and Andy might go 2. then tomorrow i THINK me and Carl are hanging out. :):):):)
............i kinda wanted things to go somewhere with Nick.....hes so...HOT. and hes so different..unlike other guys..:( :(:(:(:(: idk.
okay well..i never thought id say this..but i miss Matt..okay just a LITTLE.. like i dont even know if its even HIM i miss..or if its just the times..yea..thats it.. the TIMESS..awww....
I wanna hang out with Travis.
O MAN! i almost forgot! the MOST GOERGOUS GUY EVER IS IN MY 7TH HOUR! well..hes so fucking hot... ahhh..lol me and Amanda wanna .......ah.lol hes so hot.
I think on Friday im going partying with Amanda and Ashley. not sure if thats good or bad....but im not doing drugs or drinking. hopefully some random guy will be there and hell be like..my prince charming. lol. awwww :):):):):):):):):) but o i wanted NICK!! ahhhh...
what the hell am i listening to??
well.. i best be off.

.......its not YOU i miss..its the PERSON i thought you WERE.......

BIG KISSES AWWWWW.

Alyssa Ashley.

A.AA.AH < aw good times :(:)

nice..

2005-09-10T21:33:48Z

well..i guess i have a request for an update. lol
so here it is..
School has been good! i have 2 classes with ALEXA! SCORE lol. I am at the library right now..cuz i dont have a comp..obviously.. but anyways.. i havent really done a whole lot....i actually went running the other day. lol
ive been talking to Andrew alot..which is nice.. but i dont know if i have any "feelings" for him tho..i dont know tho!
This year is gonna be awesome! im gonna make it awesome! and i LOVE FALLOUT BOY and i wanna go to the concert on my bday..nov.17! yes!!lol
well ill update more LATER..maybe..
cuz im bored and my sisters here so were gonna go party..ya. lol
WELL LATER.

Alyssa

p.s.
the schools librarians are gay..

just another stupid american

2005-09-04T03:04:44Z

yeah. tonight was interesting. we played flashlight tag..and told "scary stories" lol. and then Andy had his Micheal Meyers mask..and yeah that scared me a bit. lol.

HMMMMMMM:::: so Jackie told my Sister to call me today..and ask me if id go to Freds BDAY thing at the house.. the only reason im gonna go is cuz JAMES might be there. otherwise i probly wouldnt.

Last night i hung out with Carl. it was fun. he made me a hot mix. its hot.

wouldnt it be cool if i had a boyfiend to buy me pretty things..

:)

well.....i have no idea what to talk about.... oh..TUES.::::: Counslers appt. SHIT. funfun..

Well. Peace Nig.

Alyssa Ashley

p.s.

.what is a hollaback girl?
.why do people only have to fart when their at school? - Kaira lol
.why do girls find it fun to gossip?
did Jessie and Natalie really jump Kait? ....not saying that would be bad..the chicks such a pathological liar....lol..er...
.why do u feel the need to drink milk after u eat chocolate?

wierd...! okay..

yikes

2005-09-01T01:33:13Z

hey ..yeah im living at my Dads so my entries are gonna be RARE..yeah..
but anyways..
i hate it at my dads..yeah..
today Kaira Alexa and Allyson woke me up at like 12:00 and we went to the jr high to pick up Andy and Ambers brother from f2bol practice. it was fun me and Allyson and Kaira went to run with them cuz they were running back n forth. then we went to the mall..ha..yeah we were so loud and obnoxious. lol it was awesome tho..!! schools coming!!!!!!!!!!! hurray! im applying to hottopic..i wanna work with Roxy! thatd be o so chill!
im also so pissed at my Mom cuz she owes me 40 bucks and when i asked her about it today shes like i already payed you..but she def. didnt. FUCK.
okay well..peace.

*you need him.i should be him*
*WHERE IS YOUR BOY TONIGHT?*
Alyssa

o boy o boy.

2005-08-26T06:02:38Z

so Justines Mom decided not to even call my Mom..so the CO thing is off..meaning b4 school starts ill be living with my Dad again..no comp also lol. YAY. Anyways..Im so pissed..cuz i wanted to go SO BAD! fuck..

Today was so GRAND. I woke up..and I called Jeremy..but he hurt his back so we couldnt hang out..and so Kaira, Jenna and Alexa came and picked me and Paige up and we went for icecream..it was a hoot.lol then we came back here and we all put swimming tubes on and it was wierd. lol and then I went to Kaira and Alexa's house..and that was fun shtuff.lol then we went to the game..but went to my Dads house a couple times..and at the game..me and Alexa were cheering for the cheerleaders (one was Kaira) and holy crap ppl got mad! lol you think theyd appreciate some encouragement.lol but Alexa made a cheer up::
Cheerleaders Cheerleader.
they are such bitches
if you wear eachothers panties,
your crotch will get itches.
lol i love it
then we like walked around and were like shouting wierd things at ppl. like Andy's famous made up quote "STRANGA! there are things in these parts that dont belong" lol HIGHlarious! GRAND!
Anyways..
I FUCKING want to go TO CO with JUSTINE!!!!!!!!!!
:(:(:((::(
oh man.....I want to hang out with Jeremy...o so bad!

Yeah so im pretty much the worst attempted cheerleader.

okay well..im so hyper and yet so upset and happy all in one its freakin crazy! Well..gotta rocket.

Alyssa